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Posted by on Monday March 3, 2014 at 14:16:35:

One of the reasons why I love Lagos is that it is one of the few cities that has a lot of people in Nigeria. It's because there are a lot of people that is why there are also a lot of public facilities and a lot of products/services that make the Nigerian life, a bit easier and enjoyable.

What do you do when nature calls you and you need to take a shit? You may probably pretend not to listen and may try to resist but when nature calls you, you will have to answer at one time or the other and it's probably best to answer soon so that you don't alter the natural forces.

Where do you take a shit when your digestive system can no longer hold it in? What do you do if you feel the need to excrete?

Well, one of the first things you need to do is find a rest room or toilet and I have to say that when it comes to this issue, home is always best because one can't really trust the public toilets in Lagos Nigeria.

I think most middle class Nigerians who live in cities like Lagos at least each have a comfortable place where they can take a shit when they feel the need to and also feel safe doing so. The case may be a bit different if one were living in a "face me I face you" home where there are a large number of tenants sharing a few number of toilets.

Public toilets are only an option when you don't have access to that your lovely rest room at home and you can no longer delay nature.

Cool places to shit
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Well, apart from one's home, here are other cool places one can shit in Lagos:

- Restaurants: It wouldn't make sense if a top restaurant that is air conditioned didn't at least have a toilet where people can ease themselves. Even for most of them, you don't need to buy anything to use their rest room. However, I'd advise you at least show some appreciation by at least buying something like meatpie from them to say thank you. I've tried the one at Chicken republic and it was awesome. Very well air conditioned and neat.

- Large Shopping malls: This is probably the best alternative as it's normally kept neat and there is a full time staff responsible for keeping them so. Some require you to pay a small fee to use while for others that are bigger, it's basically free. I've tried out the ones at Palms shopping mall Lekki, Ozone cinemas Yaba and AOS mall Surulere(N20).

- Banks: Yes, now more and more banks also provide their customers with a rest room where they can ease themselves. I've tried one at Skye bank and it was wonderful.

Other not so cool public places
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- University hostels and public toilets: These are among the worst places to take a shit but you may have no other option if you find yourself in a large university campus and especially in a day when the non-Academic staff fails to show up for work.

- Public library toilets: Yes, some public libraries also have toilet facilities but don't expect to be impressed by them. However public libraries are scarce in Lagos.

- Cybercafes: If you know of any big cybercafe around you, chances are that they also have a toilet where you can take your shit. It may only be made available to customers and not just anyone so just buy a ticket or something first.

- Religious centers(Churches and Mosques): Yes, they also do provide these public facilities as part of their social responsibility. I don't think anyone is prevented from using them but I think it is only fitting if you were actually a member. I think of all the Church toilets I've gone to, only the one at St Dominics Yaba impressed me.

- Mobile toilets: These are mostly available at public events like weddings, outdoor parties and other places where there is no fixed toilet facility. I've tried this at NYSC camp but felt a bit awkward.

- Road Side: Well, if you were travelling on the road and there is nowhere to take a shit in Lagos, you can try out the roadside like on the gutters or inside some bush. Don't do it on the road or where people pass so you don't become a public nuisance. However, this may not be legally acceptable as some Lagos task force may arrest you so you would just have to be on the lookout and be ready to bail yourself if you are caught. Again, Don't ask me! I've never done it before but people do it when there is no other option.






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